Lent

Have mercy on my darkness, my ashes

/ Eric Mathews / 2 Comments
photo by Elvis Bekmanis on Unsplash

 
Lord, have mercy.
Have mercy on my darkness, my weakness, my confusion.
Have mercy on my infidelity, my cowardice, my turning about in circles,
    my wandering, my evasions.
I do not ask anything but such mercy, always, in everything, mercy.
My life here at Gethsemani – a little solidity and very much ashes.
 
Almost everything is ashes.
What I have prized most is ashes.
What I have attended to least is, perhaps, a little solid.
 
Lord have mercy.
Guide me, make me want again to be holy,
    to be a man of God even though in desperateness and confusion.
I do not necessarily ask for clarity, a plain way,
    but only to go according to Your love,
    to follow your mercy, to trust in Your mercy.
 
Thomas Merton, 1915 – 1968, American Catholic writer and Trappist monk
 
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To you, Lord, I called;
    to the Lord I cried for mercy:
“What is gained if I am silenced,
    if I go down to the pit?
Will the dust praise you?
    Will it proclaim your faithfulness?
Hear, Lord, and be merciful to me;
    Lord, be my help.”

You turned my wailing into dancing;
    you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy,
 that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent.
    Lord my God, I will praise you forever.
 

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mourning my sin

/ Eric Mathews / 2 Comments

Photo by Sasha Freemind on Unsplash

 
Eternal Father,
You are good beyond all thought,
    but I am vile, wretched, miserable, blind;
My lips are ready to confess,
    but my heart is slow to feel,
    and my ways reluctant to amend.
I bring my soul to you;
    break it, wound it, bend it, mold it.
Unmask to me sin’s deformity,
    that I may hate it, abhor it, flee from it.
My natural abilities have been a weapon of revolt against you;
    as a rebel I have misused my strength,
    and served the foul adversary of your kingdom.
 
Give me grace to mourn my unconscious folly.
Grant me to know that the way of transgressors is hard,
    that evil paths are wretched paths,
    that to depart from you is to lose all good.
I have seen the purity and beauty of your perfect law,
    the happiness of those in whose hearts you reign,
    the calm dignity of the walk to which you call,
         yet I daily violate and condemn your precepts.
 
All these sins I mourn, lament, and for them cry pardon.
Work in me a more profound and abiding repentance;
Give me the fullness of a godly grief that trembles and fears,
    yet ever trusts and loves,
    which is ever powerful and ever confident;
Grant that through the tears of repentance may see more clearly
    the brightness and glories of your saving cross.
 
 
__________________________
 
 
Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, 
    but worldly sorrow brings death. 
See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: 
    what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, 
    what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done. 

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beginning Lent

/ Eric Mathews / Leave a comment
image via Pexels
 
 
Loving Lord,
at the beginning of this Lenten season,
we are met with the challenge of handing over
every bit of our lives that do not come from You.
To rid ourselves of what clutters our lives,
and all that distracts us from the simple truth
of Your love for us.
 
Your prophets have called us to change the way we worship—
to make internal sacrifices instead of external ones.
To seek justice, and love kindness,
and walk humbly with You
each and every one of our days.
 
If we don’t give anything up for Lent,
then let us at least give up this:
that we might cease living in ways that disconnect us from You,
for every one of our steps is like a circle around Your temple.
Perhaps this Lent,
we can give up our way
and give ourselves to Your way for us.
 
So, lead and guide us on this Lenten way.
May we walk with Jesus toward the hill just outside of Jerusalem.
May we like Him take up our cross and follow,
spending each moment of our lives living responsively to You,
just as Christ Himself did.
For that is the faithful way. 
Amen
 
Patrick Ryan, Presbyterian pastor in West Virginia.
 
___________________________
 
 
Then he said to the crowd, 
“If any of you wants to be my follower, 
    you must give up your own way, 
    take up your cross daily, 
    and follow me. 
If you try to hang on to your life, 
    you will lose it. 
But if you give up your life for my sake, 
    you will save it.
 

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Gather me into your loving arms, O Lord

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Dear Father: How it must crush you when I turn my back on you and walk away.
How you must weep when you see me disappear over a far horizon
    to squander my life in a distant country.
Thank you that although I have sometimes left home,
    I have never left your heart.
Though I have forgotten about you,
    you have never forgotten about me.
Thank you for the financial crisis or the famine or the pigsty
    or whatever it took to bring me to my senses.
And thank you that even though what brought me home 
    were pangs of hunger instead of pangs of conscience,
    yet still, even on those terms, you welcome me back.
Thank you for the forgiveness and the restoration you have lavished on me –
    me, the one who needed them most but deserved them least.
 
I confess that there is inside me not only the prodigal son,
    but also a critical older brother.
How dutiful I have sometimes been, 
    and yet so proud of the duties I have done.
How generous I have been in my opinion of myself,
    and yet so judgmental in my opinion of others.
How often I have entered into criticism,
    and yet how seldom I have entered into your joy.
 
Gather both the prodigal part of myself and the critical part of myself
    in your loving arms, O Lord.  And bring them home.
 
Ken Gire, American author and speaker
 
_____________________________
 
 
‘For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; 
    he was lost and is found.’ 
So they began to celebrate.

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Loss is indeed our gain

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The pushing and shoving of the world is endless.
    We are pushed and shoved.
    And we do our fair share of pushing and shoving
        in our great anxiety.
    And in the middle of that
        you have set down your beloved suffering son
        who was like a sheep led to slaughter
        who opened not his mouth.
    We seem not able,
    so we ask you to create the spaces in our life
    where we may ponder his suffering
    and your summons for us to suffer with him,
    suspecting that suffering is the only way to come to newness.
So we pray for your church in these Lenten days,
    when we are driven to denial —
        not to notice the suffering,
        not to engage it,
        not to acknowledge it.
So be that way of truth among us
    that we should not deceive ourselves.
That we shall see that loss is indeed our gain.
We give you thanks for that mystery from which we live.
Amen.
 
Walter Brueggemann, 1933 -,  American Protestant Old Testament theologian
_____________________________
 
 
For to this you have been called, 
    because Christ also suffered for you, 
    leaving you an example, 
so that you might follow in his steps.

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desiring you with my whole heart

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Give me grace, O my Father,
    to be utterly ashamed of my own reluctance.
Rouse me from sloth and coldness,
    and make me desire you with my whole heart.
Teach me to love 
    meditation, sacred reading and prayer.
Teach me to love 
    that which must engage my mind 
         for all eternity.
 
John Henry Newman, 1801-1890, English Catholic priest and poet
 
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You will seek me and find me, 
    when you seek me with all your heart.

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You justify the humble

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Publican & Pharisee Icon
Publican & Pharisee Icon / Ted / Flickr / CC BY-SA 2.0
 
Humility once exalted the tax collector,
    who bewailed his sin
    and cried: ‘Be merciful,’
    and was justified.
Let him be our example,
    for we have all fallen into the abyss of evil.
Let us cry to the Savior
    from the bottom of our heart:
  we have sinned, be merciful,
    for you alone love us.
 
Lord, you condemned the Pharisee
    who, boasting of his works,
    justified himself.
You justified the tax collector
    who, humbling himself,
    with sorrowful sighing asked for mercy.
For you reject proud hearts.
    but do not reject contrite hearts.
So in humility we prostrate ourselves
    before you, who suffered for us.
Grant us forgiveness
    and generous mercy.
 
From Orthodox Lent. Holy Week, Easter
 
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To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

“But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

“I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

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remove anything that separates us

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Photo by Melissa Askew on Unsplash
 
I beg of you, my Lord,
  to remove anything which separates
  me from you, and you from me.
Remove anything that makes me unworthy
  of your sight, your control, your discipline;
  of your speech and conversation,
  of your benevolence and love.
Cast from me every evil
  that stands in the way of my seeing you,
  hearing, tasting, savoring, and touching you;
  fearing and being mindful of you;
  knowing, trusting, loving, and possessing you;
  being conscious of your presence
  and, as far as may be, enjoying you.
This is what I ask for myself
  and earnestly desire from you. Amen.

Peter Faber, 1506-1546, Jesuit Priest and co-founder of the Society of Jesus
Hearts in Fire Praying with Jesuits

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Just think how much more the blood of Christ will purify our consciences from sinful deeds so that we can worship the living God. For by the power of the eternal Spirit, Christ offered himself to God as a perfect sacrifice for our sins.

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Sometimes I choose sin

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Photo by Nick Gavrilov on Unsplash
 
Father – the truth about me is that often I choose sin:
    Sometimes I choose hatred.  Sometimes I choose slander.
    Sometimes I choose envy.  Sometimes I choose greed.
    Sometimes I choose pettiness.  Sometimes I choose lust.
    Sometimes I choose gossip.  Sometimes I choose pride.
    Sometimes I choose self-reliance.
    Sometimes I choose self-righteousness.
    Sometimes I choose self-aggrandizement.
    Sometimes I choose dishonesty.
    Sometimes I choose unkind words.
    Sometimes I choose to ignore the obvious needs around me.
    Sometimes I choose to hoard my resources.
    Sometimes I choose to neglect Your command to share the gospel.
The list of things I wrongly choose could go on and on.  And sometimes
I act on these things in ways that are darker than I ever care to state.
Each time I make such a choice, I choose death.
Today, I ask that You breathe life into my soul afresh
    and enable me to choose life – to choose You and Your ways.
 
Kurt Bjorklund, 1968- , American Minister and author or
 
____________________
 
 
For the wages of sin is death, 
    but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Praise to you, saving sacrifice

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Twelfth Station / Tango7174 / CC BY-SA 3.0 / Wikimedia Commons
 
Lord Jesus Christ,
I approach your banquet table
    in fear and trembling,
    for I am a sinner,
    and dare not rely on my own worth
    but only on your goodness and mercy. . . .
Praise to you, saving sacrifice,
    offered on the wood of the cross for me and for all mankind.
Praise to the noble and precious blood,
    flowing from the wounds of my crucified Lord Jesus Christ
    and washing away the sins of the whole world.
Remember, Lord, your creature,
    whom you have redeemed with your blood.
 
John of Fecamp, 1028-1078, Benedictine spiritual writer
 
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And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, 
    he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation. 
For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son 
    while we were still his enemies, 
    we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son.

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