love

a broken, divided family

/ Eric Mathews / Leave a comment

Prodigal Son by Fr. Sieger Koder

 
We are a broken, divided family
of lonely individuals,
each alone;
truly, we’re not a family.
Communication with each other
seems impossible,
and love vanishes into the void.
Yet both are what we desperately need.
We all need and want
each other,
but we’re too proud to admit it,
or to confess
what we’re each to blame
for our separation,
loneliness, and pain.
We add brick upon brick
to the wall that divides
and isolates us.

You alone are our hope,
O God of our salvation.
Your love breaks down
walls that isolate and divide us.
Your love heals, forgives,
and makes us whole again.
Restore us, O God of our salvation.
Reconcile us,
that we may be a family,
and live.

Vienna Cobb Anderson, Episcopal Priest from Virginia
The Complete Book of Christian Prayer
 
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Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. 
When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing.  
So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 
    ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, 
    ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf 
     because he has him back safe and sound.’
The older brother became angry and refused to go in. 
So his father went out and pleaded with him. 
But he answered his father, 
    ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you 
     and never disobeyed your orders. 
    Yet you never gave me even a young goat 
     so I could celebrate with my friends. 
    But when this son of yours 
     who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, 
     you kill the fattened calf for him!’
 
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Question

What relationships are broken 
    and need God to work restoration and reconciliation?

you call me back to atone

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Return of the Prodigal Son, Rembrandt via Wikimedia commons
 
 
You call me back to atone,
to return,  
when you see how I’ve drifted
and gone away…

I stray from knowing your holy presence,
but you never take your eyes off me;
you take not even one step away:
you’re beside me, behind me,
above and below me,
you’re with me, Lord, on all sides…
 
But it only takes a turn of my heart,
a twist of my thoughts
in the blink of an eye
for me to forget (or do I fear?)
how close you are in every hour
of every night and day…

I stray from your love
though you’re so close at hand
and believe, in self-pity
you no longer care…
 
I choose my own way
as you walk by my side;
you follow my steps
as I turn from your path…
 
I want my own way
and insist that I’m right;
I assign you the blame
as I count my troubles…

But you stay by my side
and give me the freedom
to take your hand or walk away
in my foolishness and my fear…
And still you remain,
right by my side,
though I close my eyes
to yours seeking mine…

But you call me back, to atone, to return,
and with all my heart, I know you’re right:
I’ve drifted, I’ve strayed, I’ve gone away,
I’m lost and need to be found…
 
Give the grace, Lord, to turn my heart,
to turn my mind and thoughts to you;
to remember and trust how close you are,
how near’s the mercy you offer…
 
Call me back to atone and return
to the outstretched arms of your love
and ready my heart to be shaped again
in the image of your heart for me…
Amen.
 
Fr. Austin Fleming, Roman Catholic Priest in Massachusetts
concordpastor.blogspot.com

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Luke 15:20
 
So he returned home to his father.
And while he was still a long way off,
    his father saw him coming.
Filled with love and compassion,
    he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.

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Question:

When you’ve felt guilty and fearful towards God, 
    what difference would it make to know that God is near and close by,
    waiting for you to turn towards him and make things right?

Annoint the wounds

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The Good Samaritan, ​Teofilo Patini via Wikimedia Commons
 
Anoint the wounds
of my spirit
with the balm
of forgiveness.
Pour the oil
of your calm
upon the waters
of my heart

Take the squeal
of frustration
from the wheels of my passion
that the power
of your tenderness
may smooth
the way I love

That the tedium
of giving
in the risk of surrender
and the reaching
out naked
to a world
that must wound

may be kindled fresh daily
in a blaze of compassion
– that the grain may fall gladly
to burst in the ground
– and the harvest abound.

Father Ralph Wright, 1938- , Benedictine Monk St Louis Abbey
Sharing the Darkness

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Luke 10:33-34

But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was;
    and when he saw him, he took pity on him.
He went to him and bandaged his wounds,
    pouring on oil and wine.
Then he put the man on his own donkey,
    brought him to an inn and took care of him.

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Questions

When have you been wounded caring for another person’s needs? 
Can you trust God to minister to your wounds in these times?

Have mercy on me, O God

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The Good Samaritan, Aimé Morot, via Wikimedia Commons
 
I am the man who fell among thieves,
   even my own thoughts;
they have covered all my body with wounds,
   and I lie beaten and bruised,
But come to me, O Christ my Savior, and heal me.

   Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

The priest saw me first,
   but passed by on the other side;
the Levite looked on me in my distress,
   but despised my nakedness.
O Jesus, sprung from Mary, do Thou come to me and take pity on me.

   Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

O Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of all,
   take from me the heavy yoke of sin,
   and in Thy compassion grant me remission of sins.

   Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

It is time for repentance: to Thee I come, my Creator.
Take from me the heavy yoke of sin,
   and in Thy compassion grant me remission of sins.

   Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.


Frederica Mathewes-Green, 1952- , American Orthodox author and speaker
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Ephesians 2:3-6

All of us used to live that way, 
    following the passionate desires and inclinations 
    of our sinful nature. 
By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, 
    just like everyone else.

But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, 
    that even though we were dead because of our sins, 
    he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. 
(It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) 
For he raised us from the dead along with Christ 
    and seated us with him in the heavenly realms
    because we are united with Christ Jesus.

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Question

What is an area of your life where you need to cry out to God
     for mercy and forgiveness?

True Enlightenment

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The Apparition of the Messiah, Alexander Andreyevich Ivanov, via Wikimedia Commons

 
Why can’t I retreat into a mountain
and enjoy the rest of my life, sipping wine,
looking at the moon and making haiku
like the one “enlightened”?

However hard and long I may raise
my insignificant voice of anger,
I know I cannot stop this stream;
but I cannot give up.

Those who attained perfect enlightenment
yell at me from this world and the other,
“Hey! You have been a Christian for a
long time.  How come you are not awakened yet!”

I do not want to attain enlightenment in the Buddhist sense.
My enlightenment is to follow Christ and go into the world.
I do not want to separate myself from the world.
And in the face of mounting injustice and misery,
I would like to live with those suffering people,
because Christ lives with them.

I often get lost, get angry, worry and make cries of protest,
but Christ is with me and soothes me.

Yorifumi Yaguchi, 1932- , Japanese Mennonite poet and pastor
Readings from Mennonite Writings New & Old

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Luke 6:20-22 

Then Jesus turned to his disciples and said,

“God blesses you who are poor,
for the Kingdom of God is yours.
God blesses you who are hungry now,
for you will be satisfied.
God blesses you who weep now,
for in due time you will laugh.

What blessings await you when people hate you 
    and exclude you and mock you and curse you as evil
    because you follow the Son of Man.”

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Questions

Who is someone in your neighborhood that could use your help? 
What is the need you can meet?

Nothing, I am nothing

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​image via Pinterest
 
Lord, you wanted it, here I am on the ground.
I don’t even dare to rise, I don’t even dare look at you.
Nothing, I am nothing, I know it now.
Your light is terrible, Lord, and I’d like to escape it.
Since I have accepted you, you have bared my dwelling.
Every day, mercilessly, your light uncovers it,
And I see what I had never seen before.

I see the forest of my sins behind the tree that hid them.
I see innumerable roots, impossible to grasp,
I see that everything in me is an obstacle to you,
  as the smallest particle of matter blocks the sunlight
  and brings on the night.
I see the devil attacking the key-points of the fortress
  that I thought impregnable,
  and I find myself tottering and ready to fall.
I see my helplessness,
  I who thought that I could make myself of value to you.
I see that everything in me is mixed,
  and that not one of my actions is pure.
I see the infinite depth of each fault
  in the face of your infinite love.
I feel incapable of reaching a single soul,
  through the noise of my words and the wind on my gestures.
I see the Spirit blow where I haven’t toiled,
  and the grain take root where I haven’t sown.

Nothing, I am nothing, I accomplish nothing,
  I know it now.
Your light is hard, merciless, Lord.
No corner of my life and soul remain in the shadow.
Turn as I may, your light is everywhere,
And I stand naked and full of fear.

Formerly, I admitted that I was a sinner,
  that I was unworthy,
And I believed it, Lord, but didn’t know it.
In your presence I looked for some faults
  but produced only labored and feeble confessions.
Lord, it’s my whole being that kneels now
  It’s the sin that I am that asks forgiveness.

Lord, thank you for your light – I would never have known.
But, Lord, enough.  I assure you I’ve understood.
I am nothing
And you are all.

Michel Quoist, 1918 – 1997, French Catholic priest
Prayers of Life

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John 15:5 

I am the vine; you are the branches.
Whoever abides in me and I in him,
    he it is that bears much fruit,
    for apart from me you can do nothing

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Question

Have you ever seen yourself as being important 
    to what God wants to accomplish?

Drown my Transgressions

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image

 
O Father in heaven,
I come to You in lowliness of heart
begging You to drown my transgressions
in the sea of You own infinite love.

My failure to be true even to my own accepted standards,
My self-deception in the face of temptation,
My choosing the worse when I know the better,
       O Lord, forgive.
My failure to apply to myself the standards of conduct I demand of others,
My blindness to the suffering of others
   and my slowness to be taught by my own,
My complacence toward wrongs that do not touch my own case
   and my over-sensitiveness to those that do,
My slowness to see the good in my fellows
   and to see the evil in myself,
My hardness of heart towards my neighbors’ faults
   and my readiness to make allowance for my own,
My unwillingness to believe that You have called me to a small work
   and my brother to a great one.
      O Lord, forgive.

John Baillie, 1886–1960, Scottish theologian
A Diary of Private Prayer, slightly edited
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Psalm 51:10-12

Create in me a clean heart, O God,
    and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from your presence,
    and take not your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
    and uphold me with a willing spirit. 

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Questions

What is it like for you when you come clean 

    and confess your heart’s attitudes to God?  
Have you ever felt cleansed and renewed by God’s spirit?

I approach with boldness

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​I am not worthy, Master and Lord,
   that You should enter under the roof of my soul:
yet inasmuch as You desire to live in me as the lover of mankind
   I approach with boldness.
You have commanded: let the doors be opened
   which You alone have made
   and You shall enter with Your love for mankind just as You are.
You shall enter and enlighten my darkened reasoning,
   I believe you will do this.

For You did not cast away the prostitute who came to You with tears,
   neither did You turn away the tax collector who repented,
   nor did You reject the thief who acknowledged Your kingdom,
   nor did You forsake the repentant persecutor, the Apostle Paul, even as he was.
But all who came to You in repentance You united to the ranks of Your friends,
   Who alone are blessed forever, now and unto the endless ages. Amen.

St John Chrysostom, c.349-407, Archbishop of Constantinople
The Divine Liturgy of St. John Chrysostom: Orthodox Service Books

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Hebrews 4:14-16

So then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven,
   Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe.
This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses,
   for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin.
So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.
There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us
   when we need it most.
 
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Question
 
When you’ve felt guilty and convicted of sin, how have you approached God?

Breathe on our dust – Ash Wednesday Prayer

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image via Pinterest

We respectfully submit, O God,
on this Ash Wednesday,
within our grieving
deaths and diagnoses,
that life offers us enough reminders of death
to need a liturgical one.

So remind us,
gracefully,
that we are ritually marked by death
in order to live—
and to live more abundantly.
Remind us,
faithfully,
that you breathed on the dust that became us,
and that you will breathe on the dust we become,
and that your breath on dust
always means life
and light and love.
Remind us,
hopefully,
always,
of Your presence with us,
day by day—
breathing—
fulfilling us with life ever new.
Amen.

John Ballenger, Baptist pastor in Maryland

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Psalm 90:3-12

You return man to dust
and say, “Return, O children of man!”
For a thousand years in your sight
are but as yesterday when it is past,
or as a watch in the night.

You sweep them away as with a flood;
they are like a dream,
like grass that is renewed in the morning:
in the morning it flourishes and is renewed;
in the evening it fades and withers.

For we are brought to an end by your anger;
by your wrath we are dismayed.
You have set our iniquities before you,
our secret sins in the light of your presence.

For all our days pass away under your wrath;
we bring our years to an end like a sigh.
The years of our life are seventy,
or even by reason of strength eighty;
yet their span is but toil and trouble;
they are soon gone, and we fly away.
Who considers the power of your anger,
and your wrath according to the fear of you?

So teach us to number our days
that we may get a heart of wisdom.

________________

Question:


When you think about your life and death
And one day returning to the earth,
how does the truth that God will breathe over your dust once again                                      give you comfort or hope?

Plea for Divine Presence

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Older than the morning stars 
    that twinkled in the blackness of night’s first birth,
    the rotation of the axis of time,
    bring us into the freshness of your mercy 
    and the newness of your presence.
We come to you today with heartfelt gratitude,
    not with mixing Judas paint with Judas praise
    in order to cover our hypocrisy.
Some of us come to you with triumph over tragedy.
Others of us come with enduring pain
    suffering from shameful defeat
    in an inescapable battle of life.
Some of us feel like going on
    and others of us feel like giving up.
But to you we come just as we are.
Whether we are winners or losers,
    we know that you love us one and all.
Greatest of the Greatest,
    you know just how much we can bear.
We all come to commune with you:
 
    The tireless champion;
    The tired loser;
    The retired forgotten ones;
    We all come to be consistently corrected
        and confronted by you.
    We come counting our lost.
    We come as citizens of cities controlled by crime.
    We come chilled by the cold of cowardice.
    Great God Almighty:
    Commune with us conscience clean.
    Caress us with the cradle of compassion.
    Consecrate us with courageous convictions.
    Control us with Christlike concerns.
    Great Physician Powerful:
    Pardon us with the conscience of peace.
    Place us in paths of productivity.
 
Practice the perfection of healing 
    upon those who are physically, emotionally, or spiritually sick.
This is our humble plea, 
    we present in the precious Name of the prince of peace, 
    Jesus Christ, our priceless priest. Amen.
 
J. Alfred Smith, Sr, 1931-2025, American pastor in Oakland, California
 
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For the Lord your God is living among you.
    He is a mighty savior.
He will take delight in you with gladness.
    With his love, he will calm all your fears.
    He will rejoice over you with joyful songs