anguish

Today has been a restless day,
things going wrong in all directions,
and my anger rising – at others,
at circumstances, at myself.

God, you are in the midst of this.
I sense your presence
prowling like a tiger,
pushing me, pursuing me,
restless yourself until I change.

I am ready to let rip,
to hurl stones into oceans,
to pouch my fists into a brick wall.
I am ready to shout,
to rip sheets into shreds,
to curse the darkness,
to bury my head into warm flesh and sob.

I am afraid, God;
there is no one here but you and me,
my friends are out or busy or far away.
Do I trust you enough to give you my anger, my loneliness?
Do I believe you enough to reach through the emptiness
and grasp your hand?

Credo.
God, I love you.
I can say no other words.

Ruth Burgess, English author, Iona Community
The Book of a Thousand Prayers

____________________
Psalm 25:16-18

Turn to me and be gracious to me,
    for I am lonely and afflicted.
The troubles of my heart are enlarged;
    bring me out of my distresses.
Consider my affliction and my trouble,
    and forgive all my sins.

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